you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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