Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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