She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
