Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
