Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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