I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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