Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
