just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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