Pappa wants mamma naked
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
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