Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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