Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
