I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
