Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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