goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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