Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
