and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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