Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
