I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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