Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
