Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(423): View more from Tennessee

NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool

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(203): View more from Connecticut

On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.

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(424): View more from California

he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(859): View more from Kentucky

I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.

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(954): View more from Florida

She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.

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(912): View more from Georgia

I'll call you on my way home

(1-912): View more from Georgia

Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???

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