I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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