next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
