he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it