But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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