Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
