You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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