I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize