Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Someone stole a lamp last night.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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