Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
