I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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