I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible