That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Sorry about my life...
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
