Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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