WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
someone owes me an orgasm
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
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