the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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