he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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