That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Two words: nipple clamps
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