she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
