My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize