Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize