I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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