yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
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Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
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i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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