I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize