Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
