whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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