I smell stomach acid.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
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