Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to