Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
