): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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