I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
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